self-discovery, Writer Habits

Hello 2019!

Today is New Year’s Eve. I’m sure everyone has fantastic plans for the evening, whether it’s going out to a fancy party downtown with friends or just staying at home with family to watch the ball drop on TV (which happen to be my plans!) I am also taking a hard look at 2018, all the blessings I received in what I’m deeming the best year of my life so far, and thinking about how I would like 2019 to turn out, what I want to be different, what I want to stay the same, and what I have the ability to change myself.

First off, as most people’s New Year’s resolutions begin, I have some issues with my health I would love to take charge of and resolve. I would like to have the everlasting motivation in 2019 to eat healthier, exercise at least 4 times a week on top of horseback riding (because in 2018 I included that in my exercise with not so great results), and turn the 20 lbs I’ve gained this last year into muscle and strengthen myself.

Another resolution of mine is to wake up at 6am every weekday. On and off I have done this throughout the year and in the last two weeks it has become one of my biggest falling short points! Somehow I have become a fan of the 30 minute snooze button and I hit it anywhere between 1-3 times a morning. Uhg! Not good. I want to wake up early to help with my earlier resolution. It would be nice to not have only 30 minutes to get ready for work, but be able to take my time, wake up gently, stretch, exercise, get ready, have coffee, spend time with my daughter, pray, and then go off to work with a clear head and good attitude for the day.

A great achievement of mine in 2018 was going through the Steps Study in Celebrate Recovery at a local church. I learned so much about myself, the wounds I’ve gathered over the past 31 years of my life, what I can change, what I do not have control over to change, how I can be different, how I can heal and let go, and the list goes on and on. It was hard to commit to every Thursday night 7-9pm for six whole months, but I did it! I don’t want to stop there, though. I want to focus on my flaws and really dig into them to improve. I want to be more selfless and giving to others, whether its time, money, things, attention. I want to be there for people like I never have before. I want to be able to set my pride aside and be humble in all situation. These are going to be some big areas in my character I expect to see changes in this year!

I also would like to commit myself to writing something, anything, every weekday in whatever book I’m working on. Last year, I took a lot of time off, started something and wrote every day for a few weeks then stopped for a few months. I was extremely inconsistent and unmotivated to complete any of my work. In 2019, I want to be different. I want to write like never before with a dedication I never had before and produce my best work for the world to read. I want to really learn what my Master’s degree in business marketing is trying to teach me and put together advertising campaigns for my books that really work. I want to make more than I spend to get the word out about my books, which I hold so dear to my heart. I want to reach more people and tell my stories to them.

Another resolution for me is to be wise in my mothering. My daughter just turned 4 on December 1st. I feel this is a big, important year in growth for her and I want to be the best example and role model for her that I can be. I want to give her plenty of attention, explanations, guidance, love, fun times, knowledge, wisdom, and anything else I can impart on her to help her through her own journey. I want to read more on this from wise women who mothered before me and take a good look at the examples of mothers I have known to either adopt or get rid of characteristics and practices I may have and do that are not working.

I wish to improve my riding skills and to create wonderful bonds through it, with horses and with people, that I’ll never forget and whom will touch my heart and I can touch theirs. I want to become stronger, more balanced, more confident. One thing I’m learning is the more confident I am in handling a 1,000 lb free-spirited animal, the less scared I am of handling 175 lb people in the world. Each day I spend with my horse, the more I learn about myself, about others, and about the world. I wish to continue that in 2019 and grow in that.

My last goal, and the most important one, is that I grow closer to God this year, deepen our relationship, trust in Him more, talk with Him more, read the Word more, and grow my identity in Him more. Since I turned to God in 2018, my life has been miraculous and wonderful. No, not everything is perfect and I still have hurts and bad days and trouble, but I handle it like never before. I want this to continue and improve through Him in 2019, so I can have another great year of blessings, gratefulness, and peace.

Phew! That’s it. Those are my New Year’s resolutions for 2019! It seems like a lot, but I’m determined to improve so many corners of my life.

What are some of your resolutions for the new year??

Alex Apostol, author-mother-coffee addict-fandom nerd

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